Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
