Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
