why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
