soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize