Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
