i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
4 words: hood of his car
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
stop calling my apartment porn island.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
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