wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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