Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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