i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
