he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
