i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
