definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
