Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
