just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize