I wannas sexs uuuuu
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
