I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I supernannyed him into submission
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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