She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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