With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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