i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Randomize
