5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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