morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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