Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize