chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
It's never too late to be topless.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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