Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Randomize
