My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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