You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
