its not stalking. its research.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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