Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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