I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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