He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
