hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Me too!
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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