I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Still dying that you shit outside
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize