im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
