But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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