He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
