i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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