this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
