I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
No idea. I blame fireball.