i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
