So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize