I love black thongs
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize