You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
3 2 1 whiskey
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
