all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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