I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
