i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
