Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.