David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize