People with herpes should wear stickers.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize