I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
