"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
