Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
